Perhaps you should consider an alternative:
An 80-year-old man acknowledged Wednesday that he dealt drugs at his house in return for sex with prostitutes.
. . .
When an Allegheny County judge asked Cocco why he chose a new profession so late in life, Cocco replied, "I was trying to stay alive, your honor _ pay my bills."
Cocco's lawyer, Martha Bailor, told the court her client wanted to remain sexually active after his wife died three years ago, and turned to prostitutes.
"He decided it's cheaper to pay for sex with crack than cash," she said.
It's a funny world.
Hat tip: Ace